Today I’ve been working on unpacking books in my seemingly never ending pile of boxes of books and came across AA’s DAILY REFLECTIONS.
“What a great feeling forgiveness is! What a revelation about my emotional, psychological, and spiritual nature. All it takes is willingness to forgive; God will do the rest.”
Like in everything AA this is a simple thing, but it’s anything, but easy. I will admit here before God and the Internet that I’ve always been dubious about this. I’m really good at forgiving others. That’s never been my issue. (In my opinion) But what I’m starting to hope for is forgiving myself. I’ve done a lot of wrongs. I’m planning on atoning for them in short working order, but that’s not a thing happening soon. And first I have to forgive myself. If I hurt you at X, Y, or Z point I can almost guarantee I know it and hate myself for it.
I’ve been talking with my sponsor about AA stuff as frequently as possible with the Plague, but I’m starting to feel increasingly empowered to forgive myself.
This is a foreign concept, but I’m not hating the feeling. It’ll be interesting to see what comes next.