Besides bigotry, closed mindedness, loved ones’ pain, I flipping hate being stuck in my head.
I’m an intelligent human. There are lots of ways I turn off my head – Netflix, books, things that don’t necessarily have me thinking – but no matter how hard I try I’m still suck. It’s like the outside is throwing me a six foot rope, but I’m finding myself ten feet down. I’m grateful folks are throwing me the rope. That some are willing to come down with me because they know the way out. That gratitude doesn’t help stop the hyperactive hamsters; it doesn’t stop the spiral.
But today I’m putting one foot in front of the other. I’m trying to do the next right thing. I’m trying to avoid doing the wrong thing.
I still hate the feeling, though.